...

There's never going to be a "right time" to start taking hold of what you want out of life.

Reflecting, it was as if I was waiting for some "sign" to take charge of my own happiness. I wanted an excuse to do the bare minimum of taking care of myself. Yeah, for years - who knows how many - I got by with less care than I owed myself. Crazy! Unthinkable now.

While I can't blame all of my inability to mobalize on external roadblocks, I felt a paralysis when I thought to take action into my own hands. The fear of (somehow further) rejection from those those who had already, throughly shunned me when I showed myself for what I am had some death-grip on my psyche - my whole body.